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I swear, WordPress, I’m supposed to be here. I’m not trying to break in. Don’t look at me like that.

Think…think…think…I will not let myself send the “forgot your password?” email of shame. That would make it seem too real–the fact that I haven’t been here for over a year and a half. The fact that too often I remember this blog with a sense of guilt, of longing, of missing something that I really enjoy. Hating that I’ve let it get to the point that I feel these things.

Got to Admit It’s Getting Better

I can’t believe it’s been almost a month since my last post. Sure, I’ve been busy, but mostly I just haven’t wanted to talk about diabetes. And it’s not that I’ve been feeling angry or depressed about having this disease (it happens sometimes), or that I haven’t had anything to talk about. I just haven’t been able to separate it in my mind from the insurance debacle of the past few months, and that’s an ugly thing to think about.

The Sorry State of Things, Part 2

I feel like banging my head against the wall. I’ve spent the past week getting to be on a first-name basis with customer service reps, involuntarily memorizing phone numbers and extensions that I don’t care to know, suffering through looped Enya and Kenny G. tracks on hold lines, and all the while I’m no closer to having my health insurance reinstated. Nobody I talk to has any idea what’s going on but is always certain that the other party does. If I’m talking to COBRA, it’s Blue Cross. And if it’s Blue Cross, then COBRA’s got answers.

The Sorry State of Things

The past few weeks have been generally stressful and the last few days have been especially so. After spending the better part of my afternoon on the phone with my insurance provider, being transferred from one customer service line to another, I learned that my policy has been terminated. As far as they (as well as the several prescription drug companies I depend on for my supplies) are concerned, I’m no longer covered.

The Case of the Vanishing Carbs

My nighttime blood sugar readings are a mystery to me. I consider myself a pretty smart guy—able to pick up on patterns and find the cause and effect in things when they’re there to be found. And my daily routine is consistent enough where, should wacky numbers pop up when I’m going to bed or wake me up in the middle of the night, I can usually figure out the culprit. But lately I feel at a loss as to what my body’s doing from the time I hit the hay at around 11:00 pm until about 6:00 am. It’s seems like, regardless of what’s digesting in my stomach or what my before-bed readings are, my body just rolls the dice to decide what fun surprises await me when I wake up.

¡Corre!

A cookout with friends last spring, straight out of a 1976 Sears catalog.

Every spring, I become almost giddy with excitement when I start to think all the time I can spend outside after being cooped up for a particularly nasty winter like we’ve just had here in Columbus. I think it’s because Laura and I met around this time of year—February 2007—that the annual thaw has a magical, almost nostalgic feel to it, the kind that makes me want to get in the car and just drive somewhere. Some warm-weather things I’m excited about:

Shorty Got Low

Ask any diabetic and they’ll be able to easily give you a long list of things that suck. Whether it’s the callous finger tips, the mental checklist of things not to forget when leaving the house, the fact that, as I’m sitting at work writing this, I’m starting to feel a little low, everyone’s got their “favorite” grievance. I’m not talking about the things that leave you lying in bed dreading the day, but the “…and don’t you hate it when…” things that are so fun to talk about when commiserating with a fellow diabetic.